Overcoming Self Limiting Beliefs

Most people have limiting beliefs that prevent than from achieving their full potential.

Do you know what yours are?  And do you know how to overcome them?

There are several steps that you can take if you seriously want to overcome some of the limitations you have set on yourself.

1.  Identify the behaviour or response to be changed.
This is usually, ‘I want to do something, but something stops me.’, or ‘I don’t want to do something, but I seem to end up doing it just the same.’ When working with another, it isn’t necessary to know what the behaviour actually is, they can keep it secret, if they like.

Acknowledge the good that the behaviour, or at the least the intention behind the behaviour has done for you in the past. Make clear you aren’t going to get rid of it.

2. Establish communication with the part which is responsible for the behaviour
Our limiting beliefs, the unquestioned but erroneous assumptions we hold about our own capabilities, are often held far below the level of our everyday awareness.  To move ahead, you will need to become aware of your own assumptions and counter them.  One clue that you might be holding yourself back in a particular area is the simple fact that you are having trouble making progress there.

Think of the goal that you are in the process of setting.  Try saying to yourself, specifically, that you have what it takes to achieve it - “I am a fantastic designer”, “I have superior negotiating skills”,  “I am attractive to men/women”.  You might even want to say it out loud.

What is your immediate mental response?  Does it feel wrong to tell yourself this?  Did you think back to yourself, “Don’t be ridiculous, I’m really not very good”?  Your hidden assumptions are making themselves known!  Grab onto that resistance and figure out where it’s coming from!  The single-step software provides a place for you to record these thoughts as they appear to help drive out your beliefs and let you recognize them.

Next, consider your deep, inner beliefs about the type of goal you are pursuing.  Write down every idea you have about it.  Getting things in front of you on paper is important.  A few examples might be: “There is lots of competition and I can’t compete.” “People in this field are very cutthroat and I don’t want to be that way.” “Women like men with money so I’ll never meet anyone.” “It’s who you know.” Some of your responses may surprise you once you start writing them down.  If you’re really interested in challenging yourself try writing them down with your opposite hand and see what comes out.

Once you have spent some time identifying your beliefs, examine each one.  Ask yourself:

  • Does this make sense?
  • How did I learn this idea, and from whom?
  • How does believing in this idea affect me?
  • Does it help me succeed or does it hinder me, and how?

If your belief is hurting you and your performance, picture in some detail exactly how. Think about things it has been keeping you from, pains that it causes you, discouragement, lost time. If your belief is deep and long standing, it may be difficult to destroy even once you see it is false.  Awareness of the pain it causes can provide you with ammunition to finally challenge this belief.

Copyright 2010 © NorthSide Counselling.  All rights reserved.